The woman took on a tone of disdain as she motioned her server over to the table. "Can you move a chair in between the tables for us?" "No, I'm afraid we can't put a chair in there." "Well, why on earth not?" "It would block access to the other table." "And that would be a problem?"
We looked at each other and felt a moment's compassion for our server. "It's cold in here -- can you shut the door?" "No, sorry -- we have to leave it open." (And hello, you're in an open air restaurant!). "I don't like this meal!" "This is too salty!" "Give me something else -- but take this off my bill." "No, don't take it away -- I"ll eat some of it...just take it off my bill.""Hmph!"
Wow! We couldn't believe the audacity of this woman. Complain. Whine. Be rude. Snap at the server. Gripe about virtually every part of the dining experience. The crazy part is -- it was at one of the most breathtaking and wonderful restaurants, "George's at the Cove" in La Jolla, California! The picture to the left is the view we had! The food was amazing and the service was excellent! In fact, we went back the next day and asked for the same server because she was so good and so much fun! (I even messed with her by complaining that my tuna melt tasted fishy! :-) The sad part is -- this woman definitely suffered from a severe case of ingratitude -- potentially terminal!In his book, "The Richest Man Who Ever Lived; King Solomon's Secrets to Success, Wealth and Happiness" by Steven K. Scott, we find a potent quote about gratitude: "It's impossible to be grateful and unhappy at the same moment in time. Any moment, hour, day, or week that you are unhappy, you have chosen to let your focus rest on something other than the gifts you have been given. Let your unhappiness serve as an alarm to redirect your focus and energy" (p. 98).
Psychology and the world of medicine have also started to document the incredible healing power of gratitude and having a grateful heart. Robert Emmons and his colleagues at the University of California at Davis, are leading researchers on gratitude, and Emmons is the author of "Thanks!: How the New Science of Gratitude Can Make You Happier" (Houghton Mifflin, 2007). In a recent research study, they discovered that those in the gratitude group felt better about their lives overall, were more optimistic about the future, and reported fewer health problems than the other participants.
Summarizing the findings from studies to date, Emmons says that those who practice grateful thinking "reap emotional, physical and interpersonal benefits." People who regularly keep a gratitude journal report fewer illness symptoms, feel better about their lives as a whole, and are more optimistic about the future. Emmons conclusion is that gratitude is a choice, one possible response to our life experiences. (Counting Your Blessings: How Gratitude Improves Your Health by Bruce Campbell).
The Bible has a lot to say about gratitude/thanksgiving /gratefulness/appreciation -- beyond being a Christian virtue, we now see that gratitude has a tremendous impact on our being physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually! Next time you find yourself being ungrateful or complaining, think of the many things in your life that you have to be thankful for. Adopt a grateful spirit and choose to appreciate the things that you have, can do, and experience. Not only will it drive out unhappiness but it will brighten the lives of those you come in contact with. Make a list of things you are thankful for and keep it handy to remind yourself when you are tempted to be ungrateful and become discouraged. A gratitude journal can be a tremendous resource as well -- just writing down one thing that you are grateful for each day can help to transform your attitude. Look for the positives -- have a grateful heart and enjoy the life that God has given you!
