Saturday, April 13, 2013

Pseudo Connection and Other Maladies

What a beautiful day to be at the beach. The blue sky, warm sunshine, pelicans doing a fly-by, white sugar sand and azure gulf waters crashing down in rhythmic waves. Ahhhh. Lovely. We even met a true local, a great blue heron literally walking alongside us at the beach. What a graceful and beautiful bird! He was chilling out. Hoping that someone might hand him a fish so he didn't have to do any work today!

As I watched the activity of children of all ages, some well into their elder years. I noticed a similar theme. Relaxation. Play. Rest. One little boy ran with such anticipation into the waves that he couldn't help but squeal with glee as he ran across the sand. Another group of kids was lining up to do battle with the ocean -- leaping up into the waves and getting pushed back with each wave. Only to get up and do it all over again.

Sometimes we forget to chill out and be leisurely. To shut off (or at least ignore) the technological gadgets that we seem to think we need to take with us everywhere lest we miss some tidbit of ongoing drama in someone else's life or heaven forbid, miss a call or text or Facebook message from a friend or family member! Do you remember the days before cellphones? I even remember calling people who didn't even have an answering machine, gasp! You actually had to call again later if you were still wanting to speak to that person. And it was okay. We actually had more time without constant distraction and pleas for attention. We could sit and read a book or go for a walk or take a drive and actually be present in the moment.

When was the last time you shut off your cellphone and electronics and spent uninterrupted time with the people you love? Giving them your full attention. Enjoying time together. Being present in the moment fully. Truly connecting with each other. People are starting to experience more and more loneliness and it's not for lack of texting and the like. It's that pseudo connection via text and Facebook and electronic means does not truly give us connection. Having hundreds of friends on Facebook does not replace the need to be truly known. We don't experience community during online streaming or a podcast. These are all good things but they don't replace the valid need of real, gritty, present connection with someone. Whether it's God, our partner, our family or friends, the intimacy of those relationships is compounded when we honour that person with our authentic engagement in the time spent in their presence. 

Next time your child comes to tell you something wonderful (or painful), your partner or dear friend starts talking to you, turn off the distractions and give them your undistracted attention. Soak it in. Connect. And be connected.